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November 24th, 2005

11:44 pm
i had my most intresting thanxgiving yet
i was at my dad's apartment on the beach
in Pacific Beach (that's in San Deigo...for all you LAer's)
we woke up
and took a walk on the beach
there were a lot of people on the beach
considering it was thanksgiving
and the middle of fall

then we found 3 homeless guys
Red, Kenny, and Gerald
and we took them to my dad's church
they had a lot of stuff set up for the homeless

medical exames
computers to search for jobs
and much more

it was an amazing feel to see how happy we made them
one of the homeless guys, Red, was all
"wow! im gonna get my self some food! and clothes! and that thing where they make ur fingers look all pretty!"
it was sooo cute
after that we drove them back to their home...
or rather the place where they stay on the beach
my dad bought them each a sleeping bag
and they set up there camp for the night on the sand
then Kenny played the guitar for me
and Red showed me how he burrys all his clothes in the sand
so no one steals it

it's really sad
that these amazing people have to live like this
but the sad thing is
some of them choose it
some of the them choose to spend what little money they have
on beer
and ciggarrettes.

but honestly,
as you sit in ur nice warm home
reading this post
on ur computer
take the time to pray for my new friends
and take the time to appriciate what you have

dont be afraid of bums
dont run away
dont laugh
most of them are soo nice
with such a nice heart
and they're just lonely
and would love to have
to talk to

god bless everyone
happy thansgiving

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September 6th, 2005

11:13 pm - its over
so fast.
its gone.

goodbye to
+shannon living with me
+sleeping in
+giong to san deigo
+hanging out with that boy of mine
+san fransico
+cancer camp (last one too)
+sleeping in my moms bed once she leave for work
+going to the beach
+fighting with people over jellyfish
+looking at  models at the beach
+the gym... well that only happend once. haha
+giong to the beach at night with jessica shannon laura and more
+deloris making me laugh

sooo much more.
that was my LAST summer in high school
this sucks
my childhood is being swept

i just fucking broke up with ricky...

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August 25th, 2005

06:40 pm
im home from camp
im home from san fransico too
i came home today
on a grayhound bus
by myself
i sat next to this..person
i couldnt tell if it was a guy or a girl
i didnt sleep at all
it was sccary
11pm to 8am on a stupid bus
im going down to san degio tonight
i leave for mexico saturday
umm ya...
im leaving now for san degio

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August 20th, 2005

12:11 am
today i went to some guys house with my mom and sisters.
he lives by laguna lake in fullerton. fucking nice home!
when u walk threw the front door ur in this little outdoor garden
beautiful. his backyard is a deck with a BBQ and marbel table and the deck ends at the pool
the pool has an island in the middle with palm trees
and pool is made out of rocks those big pretty ones.
theres a spa on the side.
the rest of the backyard is like a tropical garden
and theres a hamic (sp) in the back
sooooo beautiful
being in his backyard made me feel like i was on vacation in some tropical paridcie
damm it!
i want my home to feel like a damm vacation

just wait
one day.
after high school
after college
after marriage
that will be me
i dono why
but i feel so detached from my friends
like they dont give a shit about me
but i dont even care
i dont miss anyone
besides ricky. *sometimes*
i dont really care
i dono
its weird
and my medication isnt even working!
fuck lamictal! or w.e the fuck im on

im going to camp tommorrow. i leave at 8 am. i bet u guys are excited for me to leave u. i would be
im such an dsfkljsl;dkfjfjsklfhjkajsafa


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August 18th, 2005

11:55 am
crazy i know!

jessica is in town untill tuesday. she's been here since monday. it's nice to be with her
i love her sooo much
hanging out with jessica and shannon is the best thing ever. it's like heaven. or whats better is when me shannon jessica and ricky all stuffed into ricky's small little el camino. to hang out. haha that was fun.

im leaving for camp on saturday.
no worries thou
i'll be home monday
but im leaving tuesday for san deigo
i'll be home on wednsday night thou
im leaving for mexico on the saturday
and i'll be home the 1st
i guess thats a lot of random shit

but it's nice to get my mind off shit
but leaving my favorite people behind isnt always fun
i'll survie thou

school starts too soon
it's disgusting!
but senior year
it'll be nice

i have to pee

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August 7th, 2005

12:44 pm
when ex-boyfriends drive by that ur still in love with it makes u cry.

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July 17th, 2005

12:35 pm - i ramble

Naked bodies calls for naked souls

they meet at the darkest hour

the alchoholic aroma fills her breath

for once the tables are turned

One thing on his mind

One too many things on hers

It doesn’t matter anyways

Only her deadly past hanging over her shoulders

Differences can be found in a world of conformity

Love can be found in a world of hatred

The past is gone

The present is here

The future is near

It all adds up in the end

Like quadratic equations form the complete line

Like two halves equals a whole

People can make hearts

People can break hearts

But it takes a special person to mend one

That’s all the world needs

Because we’re all broken

Where are our menders

Find us

Fix us

Be us


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June 5th, 2005

06:01 pm - attention world!
after 3 long days; 1 exausting weekend. i am now an offical lifeguard! certified and everything! if you're dieing call me up! i'll come over and hook you up with some CPR!

also due to the fact that im a lifeguard at Soak City i get into Knotts for freeee! so anytime you wana go tell me! weeEeee


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May 30th, 2005

12:53 am

im drunk
i could have killed myself driving home

i didnt.

i LVOE jsustin!
he's MINE

durnk= fun.
but fattning.
and stupid.
and lame
but fun

takes ur mind of shit...

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May 28th, 2005

12:57 pm
omg omg omg
life is so good to me.


i have an announcement to make...

after all of my crying and whining and complaining and writing and thinking and wishing... i FINALLY have my best friend back! yes world! jackie estrella is MINE again!
i love her
and everyone.
this world is soo good to me
it gave me my best friend back
it gave me a boyfriend that loves me more than life itself
it gave me a job
it ggave me happiniess!!


i love you



heck yess

me + jusin= pit owners !
fck yess!

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